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Kindly Contrivers Notes

Author: 
Anonymous

Minutes of the Biweekly Conclave of the Kindly Contrivers of Clavicus Vile, Abanas Smeed reporting.

Eight o'clock: Meeting called to order.

Eight o'one: Meeting called to disorder.

Eight o'five: Shouting subsides.

Eight o'six: First point of order brought before the Conclave, devise appropriate response to the village of Sundercliff's plea for new farming implements before First Seed.

Eight Thirty: Discussion interrupted by unruly fidgeting. You know who you are.

Eight Forty: Fooligan excused to address embarrassing rash. Breakthrough reached in Sundercliff dilemma.

Nine o'clock: Sundercliff proposal brought to vote.

Nine o'five: Sundercliff proposal accepted by majority vote.

Nine Fifteen: Jeering of opposing voters subsides.

Nine Seventeen: Second point of order brought before the Conclave, progress report of cursed soul stone research.

Nine Thirty: Opening haranguing concluded.

Nine Thirty-One: Report started.

Nine Thirty-Two: Report concludes, no significant progress made.

Nine Fifty-Five: Disparaging remarks brought to a close.

Ten o'clock: Moment of pouting silence concludes.

Ten o'one: Third point of order brought before the Conclave, lunch.

Ten Thirty: Consensus on food-like items could not be reached.

en Thirty-One: Break suggested, libations uncorked.

Eleven o'clock: Consensus reached that cask may have been a little off. Bedlim excuses himself to engage in a laughing fit.

Eleven o'five: Horrific instance of mass retching takes place.

Eleven Thirty: Mallein loudly proclaims that she wishes she had never been born.

Eleven Thirty-One: Proclamation passes unanimously.

Eleven Fifty: Attendees scrape together five hundred pieces of gold for an offering.

Eleven Fifty-Nine: Lunch consensus reached.

Noon: Conclave adjourns to prepare offering.