1. Do not attempt to feed them without the beastmaster present.
2. Wear protective leather on arms and legs at all times.
3. Never look a durzog directly in the eye.
4. Approved songs: The Drunken Dogsbody; Winter in the Keep; Punch the Mage in the Face
5. Disapproved songs: Lusty Argonian Maid
6. Should a durzog escape its cage, do not attempt to subdue. Kill it on sight.
7. Durzogs are not dogs. Do not give them nicknames like "Spot" or "Rover."
8. Famililarity will get you killed.
9. Don't whistle.
