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Gyub, Lord of the Pit

Author: 
Anonymous

Praise of Gyub

[Kneel, face forward and raise hands above head]

Praise be to Gyub, Lord of the Pit.
  Hear us, Warbling Redeemer.
  Hail the Rebirth approaching.
Praise be to Gyub, Lord of the Pit.

[Lower hands and close eyes]

Please accept our offering, merciful one.
  Extend your tentacles and accept this gift.
  Bless us, Embryonic Prince.
May this offering satisfy your infinite maw.

[Stand, open eyes and wait for volunteer to be escorted to the precipice]

Please accept our offering oh merciful one.
  Feed and grow now, our Prince.
  Arise and devour Oblivion hence.
May this offering sate your growing bulk.

[Open floor and grasp volunteer by wrists and ankles. Gently swing with sideways motion]

Praise be to Gyub, Lord of the Pit.
  Magg-a-rathala!
  Magg-a-Nutaggon!
Praise be to Gyub, Lord of the Pit.

[Begin to rhythmically stomp feet all the while swinging volunteer faster and faster]

Praise be to Gyub, praise be to Gyub, praise be to Gyub.
Praise be to Gyub, praise be to Gyub, praise be to Gyub.
Praise be to Gyub, praise be to Gyub, praise be to Gyub.

[When volunteer has reached maximum height, release wrists and ankles. Wait for screaming to stop. Face forward and raise hands above head]

Praise be to Gyub,
  Call to us, Prince!
  Sing your fell tune!
Praise be to Gyub.

[Wait for Gyub to respond. Get down on knees with hands still raised above head]

All hail Gyub, Lord of the Pit.
All hail rebirth, day of our death.
All hail Gyub, All hail Gyub.