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Ghost-Free Papers

Author: 
Uleni Heleran

*Certification of Ghost-Free Hospitality *

By Authority of the Super Extra Very Sovereign Council of Mages Without Digits Within Bowels

Hereas the Gateway Inn and all its dark and secret places have been found to be completely free of spooks, boojums, snarks, spectral goats, revenant toiletries, or cannibal vampire anchovies,

Muthsera Mistress Dunmer-from-Far-Away Mage-Lady, Lord High Inspector of Hostelry for the Town of Sadrith Mora aforesaid, does pronounce the Gateway Inn free and clean of all otherworldly, hostile, and malign entities, with the exception of the profound and displeasing odor that arises from the Prefect of Hospitality, which, despite the preternatural magnitude of its offensiveness, may well derive from altogether more mundane sources.

Signed,

Muthsera Mistress Dunmer-from-Far-Away Mage-Lady
Representing the Super Extra Very Sovereign Council of Mages Without Digits Within Bowels